Alleluia Music Conference - Baylor University

For a year, Stephen Carrell (the music minister at my church) has been preparing the youth choir at my church for a concert they are singing tomorrow (July 22) at the Alleluia Music Conference at Baylor. For a year, I - as their accompanist - have been nervous! I attended Baylor for my undergraduate degree (Bachelor's of Music Education with a major in voice) and for my graduate degree (Master of Music with an emphasis in Elementary Music Education). I performed in many choir concerts, accompanied for voice and instrumental students and generally, have great respect for the School of Music. I learned vast amounts of information there and value my time there greatly.

Now, I must say that for most of this past year, I have been scared and worried about playing the piano in a concert at Baylor. I had visions of pages not turning, of missed notes, of too fast/too slow tempos and whatever else my imagination could conjure up!! Did I take any of that to God and place it with Him to deal with? Sadly, no! I just got more and more worried and anxious and fearful.

About a month ago, as the youth choir was preparing for the mission trip to New Orleans, I began to pray that my practice time prior to the trip and the concerts on the trip would prepare me for the Baylor concert. I have confidence that God answers prayer and boy, did he! We recorded a CD before the trip and the recording session went beautifully - only once did we have to re-record something because of a mistake I made! Then we headed off to New Orleans for the mission trip - God was certainly taking care of me!

In the first concert, on a Sunday morning, the piano was behind the choir and the air conditioning was not working too well. I struggled to see Stephen, the director, and there were other distractions because all of the kids were in front of me. So many times when I play the piano, I hear the voice of my first piano teacher, Ann Lindsey, in my head: "Don't let the audience know when you have made a mistake or are worried . . . don't let it show in your face." I must have succeeded in that on Sunday morning because no one knew that I was struggling in that concert!

That night, at FBC Kenner, LA., we were so glad to sing there - the sanctuary was arranged similar to our church in San Antonio, the choir had plenty of room to spread out, the AC was working great and we were all preparing for a wonderful concert. Shortly before it started, the music minister from that church came up to talk to me and told me that there were 3 or 4 keys that "stick" on the piano and they didn't have time to fix them before our concert. Oh my goodness - the 4 keys were in the middle octave of the piano (from middle C to the C above) and started sticking during the first piece! We sang 13 pieces that night and several people commented on how well I played! Way to go, God! That concert was definitely a confidence builder and an ego boost.

On Wednesday night, we headed over the longest bridge in America to Covington, LA to sing. Again, we were excited to sing there - the sanctuary looked new, the sound equipment was state of the art, I sat down at a 9 foot Steinway (Hallelujah!!) and we were ready! The sound guy set up a monitor behind me and for the other instrumentalists (cello, flute, guitar and violin) and it was time to start. During the first piece, which is just piano and singers, I realized that nothing was coming through my monitor. I could not hear the kids - just a kind of blob of sound. I soon realized that I was hearing their voices as they bounced from the back wall of the sanctuary, which meant I was hearing a delay - which meant I couldn't rely on my ears, I had to watch Stephen. If you've ever heard the music that we are singing this year, I can't watch Stephen as much as I want to because the music is HARD and fast and I get afraid that I'll lose my place when I look up. Anyway, I performed 13 pieces that night without hearing many notes from the choir. I had to watch Stephen like a hawk and I was stressed out by the end of the concert! I was on my way to tell Stephen how sorry I was (if I caused them to mess up - that I wasn't sure of the tempo's - that I couldn't hear at all) when he surprised me - he bragged about how I watched him and how he and I were together and that is what held the choir together because the kids couldn't hear me - there was nothing coming out of the monitors in front of them either! God did an amazing work that night - not only keeping all of us together, but also boosting my confidence again.

This post is already way too long, but I must say - put your worries and fears and anxious thoughts in the hands of God! He is faithful to guide, to strengthen and to do "more than we can imagine" when we trust Him! I think I'm ready for that concert tomorrow at Baylor - but if you don't mind, pray for all of us at 5:00 p.m. on August 22nd - that He will guide my hands and that we will glorify Him in every note we sing and play!